So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize