Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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