I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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