i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
