im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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