I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
you made out with another girl for some wings
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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