Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
