I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
