im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
