I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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