My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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