its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
