So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
my poor anus
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
