He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
