Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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