but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize