You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I think a kid would responsible me up
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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