That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
