She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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