I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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