You really coming over, don't trick.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
