Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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