On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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