brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
