You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
