You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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