The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
