It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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