There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Randomize
