Are we in a gay sports bar?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
