i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
