did you get engaged???
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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