I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
