I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
