Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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