she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
