we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
