Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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