He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize