My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
