It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
