And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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