How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm sobbing to NWA
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
