im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
A bitchslap is in order.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
