If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
