He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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