I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I got inside last night via doggy door
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
