Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize