a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize