wat bout pragnant strippers??
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
