I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
tell me about the fingering
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
